Conan’s not-exactly-resignation letter

Since Conan O’Brien released a letter saying that he would not participate in the destruction of “The Tonight Show,” meaning he’ll quit if NBC moves the show to the 12:05 time slot, Conan’s fans have rallied. Check out Facebook and you’ll see groups supporting Team Conan. Check out Twitter, and you’ll see numerous tweets about Team Conan. Look around the web, and you’ll see why people on Team Conan would give NBC cash advance loans to keep him. I am a member of Team Conan, and here is why.
10. Jay already had his chance
I think, first, it’s a question of fairness. NBC, Jay Leno, AND Conan O’Brien agreed six years ago that Conan would take over “The Tonight Show,” which has been on at 11:35 since time immemorial. Also, in case it hasn’t been said enough, Jay Leno isn’t funny.
9. Conan is right about the destruction
I think Team Conan, O’Brien’s hardcore fans, will stay up to watch “The Tonight Show” even if it’s at 12:05, but the nightly news audience will be lost. They’ll leave their TVs on just long enough to find out that Jay Leno is not funny, then they’ll go to bed.
8. Leno has proven it’s his time to go
Comedians and talk show hosts have shelf lives. The reason “The Tonight Show” has lasted so long is because they keep changing up the host, essentially making it a new show. “The Jay Leno Show,” which airs now at 10 p.m., and its dismal ratings have proven that Jay Leno’s days as a late-night comedy show host are over because Jay Leno is not funny.
7. It’s tradition
I think Conan said it best when he wrote: “For 60 years the Tonight Show has aired immediately following the late local news. I sincerely believe that delaying the Tonight Show into the next day to accommodate another comedy program will seriously damage what I consider to be the greatest franchise in the history of broadcasting.”
6. Fair is fair
If actors and hosts are expected to honor their contracts with NBC, why shouldn’t NBC be expected to keep up their end of the deal? If you agree with the argument that “The Tonight Show” just wouldn’t be “The Tonight Show” if it moves to a different time slot, NBC is effectively reneging on its deal with Conan to accommodate Jay Leno, who is not funny.
5. ‘The Jay Leno Show’ should be canceled
If “The Jay Leno Show” is getting horrible ratings, that doesn’t mean NBC should move it to a more popular time slot. It means they should cancel the show because Jay Leno is not funny.
4. No one compares to Conan
If NBC moves “The Tonight Show,” Conan O’Brien will quit the show. Who will be his replacement? Conan O’Brien is the right man for the job. They can’t put Jay Leno back on the show because he is not funny.
3. Show support
If enough people join Team Conan, NBC will have to pay attention. That doesn’t mean the network will do the right thing, but perhaps there’s a chance. The network is trying to get good ratings, correct? If Team Conan grows to enormous proportions, maybe NBC will realize that it’s in the network’s best interest to leave things be. And maybe NBC will realize Jay Leno is not funny.
2. Conan is funny
Not only is Conan hilarious, he nails that witty, clever brand of humor that we all crave. His many years of experience and his track record of always being involved in smart comedy prove that he deserves to host “The Tonight Show” and have the 11:35 time slot more than Jay Leno, who is not funny.
1. Jay Leno isn’t funny
The 10 p.m. time slot isn’t the reason that “The Jay Leno Show” hasn’t got an audience. Jay Leno is the reason “The Jay Leno Show” has no audience. Why? Jay Leno isn’t funny.